It was definitely a "I'm having a crappy day, I need to vent" moment that inspired my last blog. I just needed to air out some worries, to bring some perspective into my mind. Mum reminded me of a gentleman she sat next to on the plane on her way home from visiting with us. Not only did he live in her area, work in a building that she used to work in, and was returning from visiting family three towns away from us, but he was a twin! He asked who was helping me with the babies. Mum replied that Ben did all he could while he was home, my dad and step-mom helped when they could, as did my mother-in-law, but during the day I had them on my own. Apparently this man began sputtering, and repeatedly asking if I was really all by myself with them (they were about one month old at that point). Mum told him that I was a stay-at-home mom, and yes, I had them alone most of the time. He was shocked. Apparently, his mother - when he and his brother were young - had an army of people helping her until they were about 6 months old. She was never alone, and relied on all these other people for assistance. That story really helped ease my mind. Ok, maybe I have a hard time sometimes, maybe I lose my patience or get frustrated, but I have two newborns that need my attention. There are moms who go through the same thing when they have just one at home. A little change of perspective for me. I'll have more bad days, I'm sure. But for now my heart is soothed.
I'm mildly bummed. We were supposed to go to our friends' house this afternoon, so that we could have some adult time and a game night and the boys could have a playdate with their daughter. But since the boys still have a cold they asked that we reschedule. I totally get it. I wouldn't want to risk getting the boys sick if they had been supposed to visit someone and their kid had a cold. Still, I'm a little bummed. Hopefully they'll be better so that next Saturday we can go over.
Ben's sort of made up for it, though. He stayed home from work today! He only works a few hours of overtime on Saturdays, but I hate when he goes in. I'm so jealous of his time - always have been. When it's finally the weekend, I just want to have him home with me. I want to be able to see him and spend time together. Those few hours at work I just don't like. But I guess he woke up too tired or something, because he decided to skip on overtime and just stay home with me. ^_^ We're planning on going shopping today. It'll be nice to take the boys out as a family.
Yesterday I surprised Ben at work by bringing the boys by on his lunch break. He got to cart them around the shop, show us where he worked, and show off his babies to his work friends. He was thrilled. I'll wait a while before I do it again. I'd like the boys to grow up with fun little trips to surprise Daddy. I can't wait for the day that they ask me if we can go see him. Unfortunately, because I hadn't told him we were coming so he could tell others not to leave on lunch, he got in a little bit of trouble with some of his workmates. I'll have to plan my next visit with him knowing so he can let everyone who wants to meet the lil men know we're coming. I'm sure it will create quite the buzz, lol.
Once we got back home, I prepped a couple bottles, and my step-mom called. She was wondering if we were up for surprising my Grandma in the nursing home. So they ate, got packed up, and we carted them down to visit my grandmother, who had yet to meet them. When we got there, Donna woke her up and said she had a surprise for her. Actually, she had two surprises. My grandmother's face just lit up and she let out this "Oooooo!" I have never in my life heard her make a noise like that! She held them and kissed them and just got to snuggle. Once everyone else heard about the boys being there, my grandmother had a few extra visitors, haha! Donna took Darius out and showed him around while I visited and Grandma held Micah. Our visit was shortened when Ducky decided he wasn't happy anymore and just wanted to go to bed. But at least she finally got to see them. I guess she had been talking about them to anyone who would listen. I feel bad that it took so long, but first they weren't going anywhere, then they were too little to visit because there was too much sickness in that place, then Grandma herself got sick. I know we'll go again. Hopefully we'll be able to stay longer next time.
I feel so content right now. I love my life. Yes, it's hard. Yes, it is far more than I ever expected. It takes so much out of me. But I'm still getting in the swing of things. I'll get used to a stage, and then the boys will progress into the next and I'll have to start all over. But I get to watch these beautiful little boys grow. I get to see their smiles and hear their laughs. I get to be splashed when they're just so happy in the tub. I get to help them learn and discover. I get to hear their cries stop when I walk in the room (something they just started and makes me feel so good). These little miracles fill my heart. I have the most important job in the world - I'm training two little boys to become strong, healthy, smart, open-hearted young men. I love these boys. I love my husband. I love being a mommy. Things get hard, and will get harder, and I'll have my bad days. But I'm living the life I always wanted. God has blessed me beyond measure.
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